Tuesday, 29 December 2009
Today Gabriel (youngest son) became a man. 18 years old, out there and up for everything. The day starts out in our bedroom with the whole family watching Gabriel unwrap his presents.
Since I am unable to bend in half normally, one of his first chores as a man is to tie my shoe laces. I think there’s a certain beautiful poetry to that. Wow! he’s done them pretty tight!
Banquo starts working, by making all sorts of gurgling noises. Still no real substance to his spectral interjections though.
Later on we went for a little walk, was still hard to walk and stand fully upright due to the cut down my belly. Nevertheless we did a few hundred meters down the road and back, and this less than a week after the operation.
Sadly, when I got home I felt absolutely knackered out, and had to go and lie down. Not long after that I was really sick, which really hurt where the incision was made.
There is a part of the post op experience that is like some accounting exercise, in which you compare what goes in with what comes out. I need to get Banquo going properly, so I need to eat FOOD. But I’m not hungry, and the thought makes me feel queasy.
I ate a few bits and pieces but actually even a fledging in the nest would be hungry at the end of those small morsals. This is something I need to work on. I just want liquid, but I need to eat more substance.
So now starts a new part of the experience in which I try to navigate my way back to strength and my real life.
One week after the operation now, and I feel I’m making progress. Today I walked all the way into town (2.8 miles according to the internet), did a bit of shopping (lamb chops) bus home, two visitors, cooking and eating said food. It feels good to start the return to my life. It will not be the same but it will be more mine.